Today’s Prompt: Write a post based on the contrast between two things — whether people, objects, emotions, places, or something else. Write in the form of a dialogue

For a little fun factor, I thought I’d spin-off a conversation dialogue from the previous assignment on character assessment based on Miss Negative Nitpicker. (Pardon the bad English as I’m just trying to capture the authenticity of a non-native English speaker, and obviously an exaggerated conversation that could play out) 

Miss Negative Nitpicker (over email): WRONG AGAIN! Please change and send back ASAP. I informed many, many, many times.

Poor Sod in the office (calling Miss Negative Nitpicker over the phone):  Can you tell me which ones exactly?

Miss Negative Nitpicker: I don’t have to tell you. You make mistake. You find out. (click)

20 minutes later…

Miss Negative Nitpicker: Why haven’t send?

Poor Sod in the office: I am checking now, krap. It all seems correct. But checking again. Please give me time because I cannot figure out which mistakes you referred to.

Miss Negative Nitpicker: Mistakes not improve.  This is not acceptable. Not professional work.

Poor Sod in the office: OK, krap. It’s almost done. Sorry about the error. The sheet is not updated. Sending you the updated version.

Miss Negative Nitpicker: Why always wrong? Always late. Please do not password protect your cell so I can make changes and check your work.

Poor Sod in the office: Sorry about that, krap. We password protect to prevent any authorisation of the changes in formula. Because, small changes may cause error for people not familiar with it. This is the best way to minimise mistakes.

Miss Negative Nitpicker: The macro in your template is too complicated. It crashed my computer many, many times.

Poor Sod in the office: No macro in the sheet, krap. It works fine on our computers.

Miss Negative Nitpicker: The date is wrong. You didn’t check that.

Poor Sod in the office: It hasn’t been changed, krap. Because there has been many changes – 10x today. Please confirm the date you want.

Miss Negative Nitpicker: You should know the date. I told you many times.

Poor Sod in the Office: Ok, krap. I’ll check with team. It’snot wrong, we are waiting for confirmation.

Miss Negative Nitpicker: It’s not the right date and it’s very difficult to read your template. There should be a line in the cell. Numbers are missing

Poor Sod in the office: This is the agreed template, krap. You have also input what you wanted to add, so there are now many columns. if we change again, it will affect everything, and difficult to roll-up if not standardise. This saves time, so you can get it faster.

Miss Negative Nitpicker: You are not senior enough for this job. You don’t know how to do your work. At your level, you should know everything. But you cannot answer my questions.

Poor Sod in the office: We are doing our best, krap. I’m sending you the document.

Miss Negative Nitpicker: I haven’t received it. Don’t say you sent when you haven’t

Poor Sod in the Office: I just pressed send 30 seconds ago, krap. Please wait for it to get through your inbox. (meantime, took a screenshot and watsapp to Miss Negative Nitpicker)

Miss Negative Nitpicker: You also did not send the other file. I told you many times. 2 weeks already.

Poor Sod in the Office: Already sent, krap. I sent you a link.

Miss Negative Nitpicker: Don’t send link. Cannot open.

Poor Sod in the Office: OK. I’m re-sending. You can download.

Miss Negative Sod: Not receive yet. Cannot download.

Poor Sod in the Office: I’m taking a screenshot and I will email to you again a screenshot of the link and the jpeg.

Miss Negative Sod: I want to speak to your CEO. Not professional work. (click)

Poor Sod in the Office (eyes wide-open, looking at me): … WTF was that?!

 

*krap: A word regularly used in a Thai context as a form of politeness and as affirmation/acknowledgement used by males. For females, “krap” is substituted as “kah”

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