Another year scuttling by and in a few hours, Chapter 2017 will be behind closed doors never to be revisited again.
It’s been a strange year. I do not have any reflection to ponder upon since everything has been one hell of a maze and I’m still navigating it.
With much uncertainties and many moments of anxiousness, my footings have been wary, uncertain and nervous.
Resolution? I have none. I don’t do resolution; it’s been that way for more than 3 decades now. But I do have hope.
Hope for better tidings, better health, better luck, better mental capacity and better everything.
Most of all, the deepest of hope on the work front for another chance of another new beginning to harvest the seeds which have been planted; one that nourishes the soul, not kill it.
My energy has been low of late. The feeling in my head feels weird – it’s busy and full; yet at the same time… empty.
Thanks to sleep deprivation and work stress, I find grasping concepts, words and forming my thoughts an arduous process. I find it hard to take things in, digest and process the things I need to do, have to do, obliged to do and want to do.
It’s all been quite overwhelming. I’ve been on a verge of a burn-out but I’ll be damned if I allow myself to get to that.
To simplify my numb mind, we’ve decided on a no-festivities, no big cook-out, no home-made oliebollen, no overtly loud gatherings and no nothing.
This time, we opted for a quiet family retreat away from the hoolabaloos of noise. By noise, I not only mean the physical yapping noise in my ears but also noise from the social media world of me-s.
It was all getting a bit much.
That said, I have stopped using Facebook and LinkedIn altogether by deleting the apps on my phone.
I still use LinkedIn intermittently mainly on a need-to-basis. I have since stopped scrolling my newsfeed and reading some of the what-used-to-be-inspirational now nothing but mindless-look-at-me articles and status updates because I’ve been more irked than inspired.
The creation of BS clutter in there is amazing… amazingly pointless!
With Facebook, apart from very specific work-related mandatories, I have not log-in for about 2 months now. I choose not to and I am not sorry that I have no idea what is going on in the Facebook world. I can’t say that I miss it.
Twitter, Pinterest and Instagram each serve a different purpose for me. I still do indulge in them every once in a while.
No reflection of 2017. I reject 2017 and the whole lot of it. I’ve swallowed enough insults and I want it to be over because I am so.bloody.done. with it. It has been utter rubbish.
This will be a new beginning.
To getting back to a better, coherent mind. To start living life again. To start writing again. To get that one more break so I can get back on my feet again.
Things have gotta to be better. They just have to!
Here’s us at Grubbs ‘n Critters wishing you an incredible new year. May 2018 be a much better year for the manifestation of a higher purpose in life.
And when the stars are aligned, perhaps (borrowing a quote from the Dutch King) we all can work towards to being a bigger us, instead of becoming a bigger asshole me.